Jeremy Hildreth
Friday night of the Monaco Grand Prix, approx. 1am….
Julija and I stagger stocking-footed off the party boat docked along the Quai des États-Unis and find our shoes in the bin, and, podiatrically and psychologically relieved (had I seriously thought somebody might steal a pair of Johnston & Murphy crepe-soled saddle bucks? here?) put them back on.
Hailing an unlicenced taxi — a nice car (an Audi or something) driven by a young man who claims credibly to be up from Italy, just for the weekend, to make a couple extra bucks — we got ourselves to the Billionaire Club in the Fairmont Hotel.
I’m through drinking, but Julija wants her usual. “A rum and Coke,” I request at the bar. “Fifteen euros,” I hear, and I hand across a 50 euro note. I turn and deliver the drink and turn back to get my change.
None is forthcoming.
I make a gesture of expectancy. “Yes, it was 50,” says the barman, this time with unmistakable annunciation. Too dumbstruck to respond, and knowing full well that if any woman is worth a gilded Cuba Libre it’s my irreplaceable Julija, I consciously choose the laugh option over the cry one. “Sip this one slowly, baby.”
On the plane back to London Tuesday morning I’m talking to Guillaume, a 20-something born Monegasque, in the seat next to me. “You know I paid 50 euros for a rum and Coke at the Billionaire on Friday night. I’d never seen such a thing in my life.” “Well, at Jimmy’z the cocktails are 64 euros a piece. And they’re not very good. But last year they were 78.”
And so it seems the recession has reared its ugly head even in Monaco, whose residential real estate is officially the world’s most expensive. Anyway, I’m thinking from now on in my travels maybe I’ll track a rum and Coke index…a challenge, or a counterpart, to The Economist’s Big Mac index. Would it turn my bar tab into a business expense?
Dear Jeremy,
I too had an identical experience 3 years ago, long before this historic recession. I took my newly wedded wife to Italy and on to Greece for our honeymoon. During our scheduled and well thought out itinerary, I decided to surprise her one morning in Santorini. Upon our departure from the island of Santorini, I told her we would go to Paros Island for a day…just “wing it”. I checked us into Paros Palace owned and operated by the most extravagant woman I have ever met. She was Aristotle Onasis’s private secretary for 14 years. I checked my sources. She was genuine. “They” decided if you were going to stay with them: vacancy or not. I managed to get a free upgrade to the “juuunior suuite”, as she pronounced it. It was worth it. I was with the love of my life and we were at the most extravagant private hotel in the Cyclades. It was perfect. We had a beautiful time there for an extended 3 days. The most ridiculous part of the story was sitting at the “private” pool bar where my “Cuba Libre” cost 30 Euros and my wife’s Pellegrino……12 Euros. We had the exact same conversation with our respective bartenders. He was a bit embarrassed when I informed him I worked for the Hellenic Bottling Company for 7 years and knew the exact costs involved in both drinks. I made sure it turned out to be a laugh for the humble islander bartender just doing his job and so proud of his employment. So, Monaco or Paros, recession or not, these have been a sign of my times for years. I hope the Economist, of which I am an avid reader; takes you up on your suggestion one day. All the best on your adventures.